Wednesday, January 28, 2009
"The idea that ‘being in love’ is the only reason for remaining married really leaves no room for marriage as a contract or promise at all. If love is the whole thing, then the promise can add nothing; and if it adds nothing, then it should not be made….And of course, the promise, made when I am in love and because I am in love, to be true to the beloved as long as I live, commits me to being true even if I cease to be in love. A promise must be about things that I can do, about actions: no one can promise to go on feeling in a certain way. He might as well promise never to have a headache or always to feel hungry….
No feeling can be relied on to last in its full intensity, or even to last at all. Knowledge can last, principles can last, habits can last; but feelings come and go. And in fact, whatever people say, the state called ‘being in love’ usually does not last. If the old fairy-tale ending ‘They lived happily ever after’ is taken to mean ‘They felt for the next fifty years exactly as they felt the day before they were married’, then it says what probably never was nor ever would be true, and would be highly undesirable if it were. Who could bear to live in that excitement for even five years? What would become of your work, your appetite, your sleep, your friendships? But, of course, ceasing to be ‘in love’ need not mean ceasing to love. Love in this second sense- love as distinct from ‘being in love’ – is not merely a feeling. It is a deep unity, maintained by the will and deliberately strengthened by habit; reinforced by (in Christian marriages) the grace which both partners ask, and receive, from God. They can have this love for each other even at those moments when you do not like yourself. They can retain this love even when each would easily, if they allowed themselves, be ‘in love’ with someone else. ‘Being in love’ first moved them to promise fidelity: this quieter love enables them to keep the promise. It is on this love that the engine of marriage is run: being in love was the explosion that started it.
If you disagree with me, of course, you will say, ‘He knows nothing about it, he is not married.’ You may quite possibly be right. But before you say that, make quite sure that you are judging me by what you really know from your own experience and from watching the lives of your friends, and not by ideas you have derived from novels and films. This is not so easy to do as people think. Our experience is colored through and through by books and plays and the cinema, and it takes patience and skill to disentangle the things we have really learned from life for ourselves.
People get from books the idea that if you have married the right person you may expect to go on ‘being in love’ for ever. As a result, when they find they are not, they think this proves they have made a mistake and are entitled to change- not realizing that, when they have changed, the glamour will presently go out of the new love just as it went out of the old one. In this department of life, as in every other, thrills come at the beginning and do not last. "
Saturday, January 24, 2009
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Monday, January 19, 2009
Look! She has learned how to go up and down the stairs all by herself! But we’re still trying to teach her how to sit down and turn around at the top of the stairs so that she’s in a baby-safe position when she goes down(on her tummy).
Annabelle loves to entertain her family. She’ll do anything to get a laugh and if you do laugh she’ll do it a million more times and laugh with you! Here are some of the silly things she does:
1. She likes to get in the yoga, ‘downward facing dog pose’ position. She doesn’t actually know that’s what it is, but I just think it’s funny she likes to be upside down that way.
2. She’ll turn on our stereo and dance for you. If you don’t have a stereo near by just hum a tune or turn on a fan and she’ll dance to those noises too! Her favorite songs to dance to are the ones that you sing about her like,(think the tune, “here comes santa clause”) “Here comes Annabelle, here comes Annabelle, right down Annabelle’s lane.”
3. She likes to try on socks, shoes, and all sorts of clothing items including underwear: Elisabeth, we can see your panties! (don’t worry, they’re clean, she grabbed them from my clean laundry mound sitting on our couch downstairs…it’s been there for days)
Saturday, January 17, 2009
After many prayers and great diligence from both parents on keeping her as comfortable and healthy as possible, Thursday things started to look up. Her fevers were gone, her nose was much less runny , and not nearly as stuffy and then by Friday she was practically fully recovered. Now I just need to try and get her back to her normal sleeping schedule because since she was sick for nearly a week she started routinely waking up each night several times, even if she wasn’t all stuffed up or runny nosed, and I would nurse her back to sleep. I think I’ll give her through this weekend and then try and help her get back on a ‘sleeping-through-the-night’ schedule.
I read up a little more on RSV and apparently 2/3 of kids will get RSV at some point in time but since the symptoms are so similar to the common cold many parents don’t even realize that that’s what it is, I know I didn’t have a clue. Some cases are much more severe than others and children may need to be hospitalized. Generally it lasts from 3-5 days, which was about right for Annabelle, she was pretty sick for about 5 days. I’m so thankful it’s over!
Sunday, January 11, 2009
But she's not very coordinated and it frustrated her. So I stepped in to help, we quickly got ourselves covered up and ready and then we went outside with the kids. She LOVED it! Our driveway was clear and the sun was shining on it so she had plenty of room to crawl on the dry concrete and explore. A couple of times she would get really close to a mound of snow and touch it with her glove, but she didn't care for it much, mostly she just liked being outside, crawling around with the kids near by.
Friday, January 9, 2009
Thursday, January 8, 2009
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
Pictures from Carl's Jr.
I followed Annabelle around and took lots of pictures of her. I probably shouldn't let my 11 month old baby crawl around on dirty fast food play area floors; but I do.
Blowing out the candles
Happy Birthday Charles! We sure love you!
Fun facts about Charles:
-He LOVES the movie cars and he loves playing with cars
-He's very independent
-His favorite food besides sweets is probably macaroni and cheese and hot dogs
-He doesn't nap anymore(I wouldn't really call this fun but it is a fact so we'll include it)
-He's totally day time potty trained and almost completely night time potty trained...every once and awhile he'll have an accident at night
-He loves playing with his family
-He loves to play with Annabelle and help her out(though sometimes this causes more hurt than help...in fact a couple of weeks ago he was trying to 'help' keep her in the play room and accidentally smashed her fingers in the door, one of which is the finger she sucks at night needless to stay he stopped her finger sucking habit but it makes falling asleep time much more difficult for both mommy and baby)
-He has a very nice singing voice and knows lots of songs
-He knows the alphabet and their sounds and he can sign quite a few words(this is something we're all learning together)
Charles will have his 3 year old wellness check up in a month at the same time as Annabelle's one year old check up. I'll post his weight/height stats once I get them.
Sunday, January 4, 2009
1. I’m one of those people that likes to dip their french fries in shakes/ice cream. I also like to dip potato chips in ice cream…Scott thinks this is unappetizing. But I think his peanut butter and jelly and Dorito sandwich isn’t very appetizing either. Oh well, we’re all different and like different things. (We don’t do this often because we rarely have chips, French fries, or ice cream in the house…but we do have them for the holidays!)
2. My sweet neighbor Betsy gave us this ‘Believe in the magic’ sign for Christmas and I love it! Thanks Betsy and Michael!
3. We just finished painting our upstairs main bathroom...it'll be the same color as the rooms in the basement, I'm boring that way, I like all the same boring tan colors everywhere....and we had extra paint from doing the downstairs that I didn't want to waste so that's what we're using! It's hard doing projects like this with three little kids running around trying to get into and touch things. So we tried to be speedy and efficient: we primed it and put on the first coat last night after the kids went to bed and then this morning while Annabelle took her nap we put on the Polar Express movie for the kids and finished the job!
Saturday, January 3, 2009
Each night after we put the kids to bed, we would go upstairs to our room, turn on our lamp on our headboard and then we read and write and talk until we go to sleep. Elisabeth will occasionally get out of bed once she’s been put there for the night(I know, surprising huh? What kid would ever do that?) and so she knew about our lamp and our night time reading and writing. And so now Elisabeth has her princess lamp on her headboard and after I sing her a song and give her kisses for the night, she turns on her lamp, grabs a book or two from her headboard and sometimes her little journal and pencil and will stay up a little while longer…I’m not sure exactly what time she falls asleep but so far it has always been before Scott and I get to bed.